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joffaboy

What it felt like

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alt text
Photo of the author (with added agony)
AI render of a photo of me, representing the feeling when I pulled out the stent that had been keeping my left kidney from being blocked by 2 kidney stones for over 3 months. It should have been removed by a nurse, but the string on the outside end had come loose and pulling down undies partly pulled out about 8cm of the stent. The stent itself was about 25cm (10 inches) long with spirals at both ends.

Not shown - the two post-op bouts of extreme pain when drugs wore off. Now I know what a '10' on the pain scale feels like..

Kidney stones are no fun. It's now 6 weeks in the past, thankfully!

NSFW for representation of pain
4 hours ago
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MackReed pro 2 hours ago
Argh. Oof. Glad you're better!
wjcstp pro 2 hours ago
Yikes, here’s hoping you won’t have to do that again
jer pro an hour ago
When an ER nurse says to you "I've had two kids and one kidney stone and the kidney stone was far more painful" you stop pain vomiting momentarily to reflect on how terrible your karma must be before screaming "MORE FUCKING DILAUDID WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!!!???".
ian_whitney an hour ago
Kidney stones are the worst. Lesson I just learned is that eating a bunch of Tums can lead to them. I have a couple of (thankfully) small ones floating around thanks to Tums.
jordanbrock pro 57 minutes ago
Requiem for a Gleet
View all 5 comments
robotmachine

Check This Out

<Turtle and Snail stand with Mouse in an open field; Mouse is holding a skull>
Mouse: "Hey friends, check this out!"

<Turtle and Snail look shocked>
Turtle: "Oh my god, Mouse, did you kill a guy??"

<Mouse puts the skull down>
Mouse: "No, no. It was already like this."

<Close up on the skull who now speaks>
Skull: "I killed a guy once. It cost me everything."

<Turtle and Snail are shown again>
Snail: "And so you were cursed to an existence between life and death-- one that is no life at all-- to dwell forever on the mistakes of your mortal coil?"

<Back to Skull>
Skull: "Wow, making a lot of assumptions about the talking skull here."

<Still on Skull>
Skull: "But essentially yes, that is the situation."

<Mouse and Skull are shown>
Mouse: "Good guess, Snail."

<Turtle and Snail are shown>
Snail: "Stereotypes exist for a reason."
alt text
<Turtle and Snail stand with Mouse in an open field; Mouse is holding a skull>
Mouse: "Hey friends, check this out!"

<Turtle and Snail look shocked>
Turtle: "Oh my god, Mouse, did you kill a guy??"

<Mouse puts the skull down>
Mouse: "No, no. It was already like this."

<Close up on the skull who now speaks>
Skull: "I killed a guy once. It cost me everything."

<Turtle and Snail are shown again>
Snail: "And so you were cursed to an existence between life and death-- one that is no life at all-- to dwell forever on the mistakes of your mortal coil?"

<Back to Skull>
Skull: "Wow, making a lot of assumptions about the talking skull here."

<Still on Skull>
Skull: "But essentially yes, that is the situation."

<Mouse and Skull are shown>
Mouse: "Good guess, Snail."

<Turtle and Snail are shown>
Snail: "Stereotypes exist for a reason."
source: https://poorlydrawnlines.com/comic...
8 hours ago
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homerj

But why?

A picture of Sugar's Copper Blue on (for some ridiculous reason) ORANGE vinyl.
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A picture of Sugar's Copper Blue on (for some ridiculous reason) ORANGE vinyl.
@nikkuneko recently posted about their recent colored vinyl record purchase: https://mltshp.com/p/1RUO6

and @jpoulos recently posted a mini-doc on Sugar's Copper Blue: https://mltshp.com/p/1RU9M

Which made me realize I didn't have that album on vinyl in my collection and I really should so ordered a copy.

And here it is.

In orange.

Rant time: If you're gonna make a colored vinyl release, PUT SOME THOUGHT INTO IT PEOPLE. Orange? WTF!? The album is named after TWO colors. COPPER. and BLUE. And the album artwork is colored in... (you guessed it!) BLUE and COPPER!

HINT HINT? Maybe, I dunno... GO WITH A BLUE OR COPPER COLORED RECORD?

GTFO with this orange.

Anyways, still a great album.
10 hours ago
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bezt pro 9 hours ago
I'm guessing they were going for a complementary thing? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki...
dreyfusslugado 9 hours ago
[FP colors intensify]
homerj 9 hours ago
I will say, I am less enraged about this than my copy of "David Gray's White Ladder" which was released on a vinyl color that sure looks like gray...but which they named 'silver'.

They were SO close to getting it right on that one.
jive_t pro 8 hours ago
You can listen to it when you’re hunting
jer pro 8 hours ago
Once you pop on your Grados and close your eyes, it can be any color you want.
nikkuneko pro 8 hours ago
i always liked bob mould (my frame of context mostly being husker du) but i never gave any of his other stuff a very deep dive. need to go back for this band someday.

it's funny how often LPs are either "we carefully matched the wax to the album art / title / theme" or "this is what the plant had that wasn't black, deal with it". i'm sure i have plenty of both in my collection, but i can't think of any egregiously off-the-mark ones off the top of my head.

i, for one, love the off-the-wall random ones that i pull out for the first time and go "why is it pepto-bismol-vomit colored?".
homerj 8 hours ago
@nikkuneko I once bought Vince Guaraldi's Charlie Brown xmas on "Festive Green and Red vinyl!"

Someone failed to remember what happens when you mixed green and red together.

I ended up with "chunky holiday diarrhea brown colored!"
nikkuneko pro 8 hours ago
"it's the great plopkins, charlie brown!"
nikkuneko pro 8 hours ago
also LOL i really love this level of the design team thinking ahead, @homerj
View all 9 comments
nikkuneko

the curta calculator (and all its parts)

a dense poster diagraming the components of the curta mechanical calculator, a hand-sized cylindrical device with a crank on top. the diagram shows the numerical selector switches along the side, the pins and other moving components within the device, as well as explanatory text (too voluminous to transcribe here at the moment)
alt text
a dense poster diagraming the components of the curta mechanical calculator, a hand-sized cylindrical device with a crank on top. the diagram shows the numerical selector switches along the side, the pins and other moving components within the device, as well as explanatory text (too voluminous to transcribe here at the moment)
someone/something here sent me down a rabbithole that led to learning about the curta, a hand-sized crank-operated mechanical calculator designed by curt herzstark

image source, with tons of resources about the curta:
https://www.vcalc.net
they also sell a poster:
https://www.vcalc.net/poster...
some additional info:
https://blog.nationalmuseum.ch/en...
10 hours ago
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bezt pro 10 hours ago
Saved to https://mltshp.com/volvelle
snarkout pro 10 hours ago
It shows up in one of Gibson's Blue Ant trilogy, maybe Spook Country. (I just looked it up, and it's the first one, Pattern Recognition.) I initially thought it was invented for the purpose of the book.
scruss pro 9 hours ago
@snarkout After reading Ifrah's Natural History of Numbers, I was in the process of costing one of these out on ebay. Then Gibson's book dropped, and they all moved well out of affordability. Dammit!

I have got to play with one once. Imagine if a Leica could do sums ...
poorusher 9 hours ago
Pretty sure @scruss put me on to this year's ago

https://youtu.be/qyrY6uss...
scruss pro 7 hours ago
@poorusher I may have pointed you to the pleasantly eccentric Chris Staecker, but I don't remember this particular vid.
poorusher 6 hours ago
Could have been @ardgedee, I was asking about recs for maths adjacent videos via Mastodon.
View all 6 comments
me3dia

just what you always wanted

screenshot of video: against a purple background, a gift wrapped in a green ribbon and bow is on the right; on the left, text reads "For The Person Who Likes Sex & Violence"
alt text
screenshot of video: against a purple background, a gift wrapped in a green ribbon and bow is on the right; on the left, text reads "For The Person Who Likes Sex & Violence"
source: https://www.tumblr.com/fatmagic...
10 hours ago
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tonyb pro 9 hours ago
Sax and Violins
m3moellering 9 hours ago
@tonyb +++
otaman pro 4 hours ago
[Stone Temple Pilots intensifies]
csilverman

strange days

A scene rendered in light purple. It looks a bit like a woodcut. A winding river flows through a mountainous landscape, with a blurry forest in the distance. The sky is heavy with clouds. Flying through the sky in the distance is a witch on a broomstick. The painting is signed "Chris Silverman".
alt text
A scene rendered in light purple. It looks a bit like a woodcut. A winding river flows through a mountainous landscape, with a blurry forest in the distance. The sky is heavy with clouds. Flying through the sky in the distance is a witch on a broomstick. The painting is signed "Chris Silverman".
#notesArt
3 hours ago
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artwells

I remember winning against Mormons

A game box called "Celestial Pursuit" The Ultimate in LDS Trivia
alt text
A game box called "Celestial Pursuit" The Ultimate in LDS Trivia
To be fair, I was a pretty academic Mormon as a kid, before I abandoned the whole thing.
11 hours ago
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ian_whitney 11 hours ago
How did my relatives never try to get me to play this?
nikkuneko pro 11 hours ago
oh gracious, today i learned about this:
https://boardgamegeek.com/boardgam...

also, apologies, i kept reading this as "the ultimate LSD trivia" and spent a good minute trying to figure out why winning against mormons in lysergic acid trivia would be such a feat 🥴
artwells pro 10 hours ago
Oh dear. Here are some of the questions. I'm ashamed of the ones I got right, but am comforted by how much I have forgotten
https://www.theideadoor.com/church-c...
kplawver pro 10 hours ago
I was SO good at that game. Such a nerd and now? SUCH an apostate heathen.
kplawver pro 10 hours ago
(and, congrats on also escaping!)
artwells pro 10 hours ago
I love this one. Because the people I played against knew very little about the Bible, this is the sort of thing they couldn't get:

In what book of the bible can we find the story of Job?
Lockjaw pro 9 hours ago
We had a couple of MoGames growing up. Seek was played I think once that I remember. It - wasn't good. I've been out almost twice as long as I was in now.
urlnotfound pro 8 hours ago
I live in Kansas City, so one day I heard this joke that I will get some details wrong, but is very Mormon trivia related:

An important phone call came in to the LDS Church that was routed to the head office in Salt Lake City. The secretary goes into his office and says,
"Sir, I have good news and bad news."
"Give me the good news."
"I have a call for you from our Lord, Jesus Christ Himself."
"That's fantastic! What's the bad news?"
"It is a collect call from Missouri."
View all 8 comments
artwells

omw

alt text
Mac and me alien driving
11 hours ago
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snarkout pro 11 hours ago
Paul Rudd is that you?
wjcstp pro 8 hours ago
@snarkout ++
snarkout

me irl

An oil portrait of a small brown and white dog with a studded collar on a table. The table has a pink tablecloth. On the table, to the right of the dog, are a large white porcelain cup with a floral design, a broken piece of bread, and what is maybe a biscotti. The dog is slightly plump and has a smug expression.
alt text
An oil portrait of a small brown and white dog with a studded collar on a table. The table has a pink tablecloth. On the table, to the right of the dog, are a large white porcelain cup with a floral design, a broken piece of bread, and what is maybe a biscotti. The dog is slightly plump and has a smug expression.
source: https://bsky.app/profile...

Dog with a Biscuit and a Chinese Cup by Giovanna Garzoni, 1640s #painting #paintings
14 hours ago
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artwells

for those who celebrate, dog

Columbo on the phone saying "That's Tuesday the 18th. I'll hold."
alt text
Columbo on the phone saying "That's Tuesday the 18th. I'll hold."
11 hours ago
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jhamill

I should buy a boat

No alt provided
alt text
15 hours ago
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vosechu pro 3 hours ago
I think about this image about once a week. Usually when I get a hankering for a boat.
wjcstp

RIP Frank Beard

alt text
The only member of ZZ Top without a beard, and a solid drummer.

https://apnews.com/article...+(Feed)&utm_medium=social&utm_source=bluesky
7 hours ago
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MackReed pro 2 hours ago
Aw, geez.
tclancy

Don't

CDN media
alt text
CDN media
source: https://www.reddit.com/media...
Yesterday
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BennyTheIcepick pro 7 hours ago
Only because “SHUT THE FUCK UP” didn’t fit on the card.
urlnotfound

uncomfortable truths

No alt provided
alt text
2 days ago
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homerj

Shit Gibbon

Caption of photo showing artist in front of their portrait of Trump: Wendy Chartrand had no idea that her portrait of U.S. President Donald Trump, painted using horse manure mixed with water, would attract international attention after it sold at this year's Sooke Fine Arts Show, VIA WENDY CHARTRAND
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Caption of photo showing artist in front of their portrait of Trump: Wendy Chartrand had no idea that her portrait of U.S. President Donald Trump, painted using horse manure mixed with water, would attract international attention after it sold at this year's Sooke Fine Arts Show, VIA WENDY CHARTRAND
Yesterday
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robotmachine

 

Ciudad Juárez, 1892. Juan holds up a burrito and saysỗẠbehold luis, I call it: the burrito." Luis eats it and says "this is delicious Juan, but how on earth does this look like a little donkey?" Juan thinks and surmises "it looks like the ones I grew up with." Juan takes Luis to a field of small, bow-legged cylindrical donkeys who appear to me in great distress. Luis looks on in terror as one of the donkeys repeats
"kill me. kill me."
alt text
Ciudad Juárez, 1892. Juan holds up a burrito and saysỗẠbehold luis, I call it: the burrito." Luis eats it and says "this is delicious Juan, but how on earth does this look like a little donkey?" Juan thinks and surmises "it looks like the ones I grew up with." Juan takes Luis to a field of small, bow-legged cylindrical donkeys who appear to me in great distress. Luis looks on in terror as one of the donkeys repeats
"kill me. kill me."
source: https://bsky.app/profile...
12 hours ago
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snowbow

 

No alt provided
alt text
I made my first ever seamless pattern! I want to start a spoonflower account, or some other pattern shop for making wallpaper and textiles. Working on the second one in this series now 🍄
Yesterday
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robotmachine pro Yesterday
Can you share your Spoonflower account once you have it up and running? My spouse makes things and she uses a lot of prints from Spoonflower. <3
snowbow Yesterday
@robotmachine aw that’s so nice! Of course 😊
MackReed

m. giraud

alt text
source: https://www.tumblr.com/curatoro...
Yesterday
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m3moellering Yesterday
I’m pretty sure that I have the Heavy Metal this was in.
MackReed pro Yesterday
@m3moellering I useta, but got rid of my collection decades ago, like a dope.
waa pro 14 hours ago
The man had a 3D-renderer in his head before they existed. (Just like Winsor McCay)
m3moellering 14 hours ago
@waa ++
MackReed pro 12 hours ago
@waa YES
View all 5 comments
artwells

Team Quickie Swishes Rules OK

Illustration of someone washing their face with the caption "Fig. 27-8. Don't consider "quickie-swishes" a substitute for thorough cleaning.
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Illustration of someone washing their face with the caption "Fig. 27-8. Don't consider "quickie-swishes" a substitute for thorough cleaning.
11 hours ago
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robotmachine

 

<Image of detective Colombo using a phone; he is holding and looking at some notes>
"That's Tuesday the 18th.
I'll hold."
alt text
<Image of detective Colombo using a phone; he is holding and looking at some notes>
"That's Tuesday the 18th.
I'll hold."
10 hours ago
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heyitsal

Best gift ever

No alt provided
alt text
I've been giving a friend of mine pool lessons every week. She recently went up in rank because she's been practicing all the drills she's learned like mad. The other day she ran a 3 ball drill. All 3 positioned in order without the cue ever hitting the other balls. She also owns the local Lego resell shop. It's a very thoughtful gift that refers back to this post: https://mltshp.com/p/1RC3C
Yesterday
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wjcstp pro Yesterday
wow, this is wonderful
MackReed pro Yesterday
The tubas really make it.
jordanbrock pro Yesterday
I wanna rock all night, and polka every day.
artwells

"after sandwiches, well, I'm going to shiv you"

alt text
Dolly Parton saying something to Miss Piggy
11 hours ago
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rogrtheshrubber pro 8 hours ago
"Let's have a three-way by Wednesday, okay?"
misslivie

convince me otherwise: Gonzo is a chicken

a close up photo of a white chicken head on at the camera (the beak looks like Gonzo's nose)
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a close up photo of a white chicken head on at the camera (the beak looks like Gonzo's nose)
Foggy is a HAM for the camera
15 hours ago
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artwells

car repair time

alt text
vintage clip of a child throwing a handful or cash out a window
Yesterday
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jhamill

Time

image
alt text
image
source: https://dreaminginthedeepsouth...
14 hours ago
  • 162 Views
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joffaboy pro 4 hours ago
That looks Galifreyan https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki...
BennyTheIcepick pro 2 hours ago
Sadly time cube has been off the internet for so long I don’t remember how to emulate his voice. I just remember everything was ALL CAPS
gwint

Look Out Stump (Gretel)

No alt provided
alt text
Anne Siems
2026
https://www.annesiems.art/

via https://bsky.app/profile...
11 hours ago
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jhamill

Sail

No alt provided
alt text
source: https://www.c-heads.com/2026...
14 hours ago
  • 220 Views
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otaman

Bunch of Canadian jerks

No alt provided
alt text
Yesterday
  • 406 Views
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MackReed pro Yesterday
*uncontrollable 2-phase snickering*
m3moellering Yesterday
@MackReed /same
scruss pro Yesterday
as a scot, they're fucking welcome to it.
pipes are not meant to be enjoyed.
they are meant to scare the living shit out of your enemies
zeitgeist 22 hours ago
guy can't even unclench his hand after that.
robotmachine pro 13 hours ago
I guess I'm the weirdo that enjoys the sound of bagpipes. :(
robotmachine pro 13 hours ago
For me it's the drones that really do it for me.
View all 6 comments
scruss

jwz's cards

two stacks of cards, showing front/back of a red card with white text.

front: (all caps, large) Do Not Talk To Me About "AI"
(all caps, small)You Make Me Long For The Sweet Embrace Of Death

back: By using AI, you have given a pass to

* the staggering climate and ecological impact
* The outright attack on labor by capital
* The systemic disregard of consent
* The basis in wholesale theft and plagiarism
* The assault on the very concept of objective truth
* The enrichment of the most cringe billionaire fascist motherfuckers the world has ever seen

There is no ethical use of AI

If you ignore all of that, you are trying to negotiate what level of harm to others you find acceptable for your personal, selfish benefit. You advance the agenda of these hollow-eyed joyless money-ghouls who resent art, creativity, and life itself.

The machine is disgusting and must be destroyed
alt text
two stacks of cards, showing front/back of a red card with white text.

front: (all caps, large) Do Not Talk To Me About "AI"
(all caps, small)You Make Me Long For The Sweet Embrace Of Death

back: By using AI, you have given a pass to

* the staggering climate and ecological impact
* The outright attack on labor by capital
* The systemic disregard of consent
* The basis in wholesale theft and plagiarism
* The assault on the very concept of objective truth
* The enrichment of the most cringe billionaire fascist motherfuckers the world has ever seen

There is no ethical use of AI

If you ignore all of that, you are trying to negotiate what level of harm to others you find acceptable for your personal, selfish benefit. You advance the agenda of these hollow-eyed joyless money-ghouls who resent art, creativity, and life itself.

The machine is disgusting and must be destroyed
source: https://mastodon.social/@jwz...
2 days ago
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artwells

beep boop grrrrrrr boing boing, dog

alt text
vintage viditel audio link through a phone
Yesterday
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pk pro Yesterday
a company accidentally named by someone severely congested
waa pro Yesterday
Ooooh. Flashback to 1980! Saved to https://mltshp.com/dutch ! Never really took off. Can't remember I actually used it.
dapete 19 hours ago
DAMMIT MOM! DON'T PICK UP THE PHONE!

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