👏👏👏

real

Toonces

You've been spying on my driving.

omg so same

Fckin bees 😡

Finally! I can say "I'm just like Charles Darwin!" and mean it!

“I am very poorly today & very stupid & hate everybody & everything” is my new auto reply.

For those interested, all of Darwin's correspondence has digitized and placed online for perusing: https://www.darwinproject.ac.uk/full-edi...

@bencmeissner for over a decade I kept a framed photo of Darwin on my work desk with that quote at the bottom

The 1836 quote would've been written while he was still on the Beagle. He was a martyr to seasickness, despite the years he spent at sea

I went to an exhibition of her works a few years back, and while I really dig her works, boy did those lines fry my brain

Curvy

No pants, no belt, no beard!
Not like us.

Greatest cover of all time

his hands are little, his features are small, you know, a little guy!

We had this in our bookcase. (Never read it.)

Like the souls of departed hands, abandoned to the rains.

Whatever. I used to be a star.

@BennyTheIcepick ++

i want one

Would

Have seen docu. Can recommend, tho had to wear dark glasses for a few days

The snails'll come out, tomorrow. Betcher bottom dollar that tomorrow there'll be snails.

looks like someone is planning their holiday. better make sure they've got plenty of lube.

I'm sure this seemed a good idea at the time, but I forget when that was.

making this involved doing trig from the shell, which I recommend to no-one

*SPROIOIOIOINNNNGG*

His crush thinks Mike is a goddam idiot for going on national television to talk about her chest.

that explains why he's not answering the door

Always delightful

@jive_t hahaha

@wjcstp truly!

As one does.

I really do love you, Canada. You deserve so much more. (Also I hope you get salty enough from this that you stop all the crude oil coming over the border right before our midterms and make gas prices go kablooie, then point and laugh.)

Gold is for show-offy countries. Taking part should be enough

˄ Exactly this. The bronze medal captures the essence of Canada's intrinsic character. Gold is an embarassing display of ego and dominance. Silver is perhaps the biggest loser, coveting what Gold got but failing. Bronze is just the right amount of winning; on the podium but not hogging the spotlight. Bronze is the Gold medal of participation ribbons, and for Canada that's just the right mix of pride and humbleness.

Except in the case of Hockey. Anything but a Gold in hockey is an absolute catastrophe and a national embarassment.

@scruss @otaman One of the best comments I've seen about this Olympics is that the U.S. should be doing super well because we've shown how good we are at going downhill in the last year and we act like we should be well rewarded for it. Annnnnnd that about sums it up.

@williwaw that would be a bit harsh for me to come right out and say.

@otaman Canada has to win gold in ice hockey, partly because the rest of the world outside North America thinks it's a ridiculous sport

It’s a building year

Brazil gold medalist: https://mltshp.com/p/1RKEP

Philip Morris's reception area.

Those Marlboro Miles finally paid off.

"Got a light?"

I LIKE BIG BUTTS AND I CANNOT LIE

Title +++

It's a major award!

@MackReed Genuine lol!

One day when I was young, I went with my father and some relative to visit a used car lot a long way away from our house. This was the early 80s sometime and the lot was decorated with long streamers of multi-color flags. On one corner, the streamers were tied on just some light pole. But on the other, it was a giant pen. Fifteen feet tall, made of unpainted and rusted iron, it had a four foot wide circular base and was some kind of fancy pen that had obviously been welded up as an advertisement at some time in the past.

I decided then when I got rich, I would collect very large art versions of things and have a special museum built for them. I am still not rich, so you can't visit my museum yet.

Representing about 5 years' income in Australia

@joffaboy "Pack a Marlboro reds, please."
"Yes, I have spoken to the bank."

True story. At a bar in NOLA in '96 or '97 (Lakeview/Mid-City, not touristy). Midnight-ish. Warm enough to be milling outside. And then the Marlboro van pulled up. Out jumped women in outfits similar to Hooters staff. Handing out free cigarette packs and other swag (I got a CD of background sounds and ambient music from old Marlboro ads, my wife got smokes). The memory is hazy, but I'm pretty sure one of them was carrying one of these lamps to give away too. In decades of telling this story, I have never met anyone who has even heard that there was a marketing campaign like that. But it wasn't a dream ... I still have the CD.

My wife thinks what I'm remembering was a big inflatable cigarette, and not a lamp.

@BooBounder The world needs a lossless rip of that Marlboro CD. I'm not seeing anything by your description on Discogs.

Hot dog is a taco.

"

Saved to /moss

Instagrampaw

@ardgedee you win.

@ardgedee +++