Dear Penthouse- I never thought I'd have a story for you

You can't fool me. Penthouse Pizza is that thing where you shave your pubes in a triangular slice shape.

*shudder*

It's just egg salad with a baked ritz cracker crust.

I was a baker at a small Midwestern bakery when in walked these 2 girls…

Ritz crackers, cornflakes, whatever.